iPhone 5 Pro lunacy and five other things the next generation won't be

The passing of the white iPhone 4 release means it's a slow week for iPhone 5 news, and so it's no surprise that the same old agenda-based claims are being trotted out by those geek headline writers who honestly believe they can influence Apple's iPhone 5 plans simply by publishing their fantasies in the hopes of gaining popular support and forcing Apple to take heed. Straight from the "It's never worked so why would it now" files, here are the top nonsensical iPhone 5 claims which you can dismiss out of hand.

iPhone 5 Pro – the claim: a more expensive model with a slide out keyboard. The reality: after spending four years proving that slide out keyboards are the floppy drive of their era, Apple won't suddenly go backwards now.

iPhone 5 with card slot – the claim: for no clear reason, the next iPhone will have a camera card slot. The reality: even Apple's laptops don't have one anymore.

iPhone 5 with this geeky feature, that geeky feature, or the other geeky feature – the claim: after years of successfully ignoring geek demands in favor of making the only smartphone that non-geeks actually like, Apple will suddenly reverse course and begin pandering to the geek minority for no clear reason. The reality: well, you know…

Here's more on the iPhone5.